In the ring, Crusher looms over an unaware Bugs as he boasts how he'll defeat Crusher. Faces in the crowd look up rather nervously. Above and behind Crusher is a sign, "The Sportin' Life."
Crusher is in the wrestling ring with lightweight Mascara Del Loco Jr. While Del Loco attacks in a flurry of activity, Crusher just stands and takes it until he rather boredly swings a metal folding chair and sends Del Loco into the ropes. This is a bit much for Bugs who inquires about the referee's senses and then taunts Crusher. Crusher's response causes him to lose the match on a technicality. This only makes Crusher angrier at Bugs.
Bugs turns it around and tells Crusher he needs a manager to help him keep his focus. An instant later Bugs, in strange outfit, is Crusher's new manager. The rabbit has Crusher practice, but instead of wrestling moves has Crusher work on his presentation. Unfortunately, Crusher isn't any good at trash talk. Bugs suggests a few tongue twisters, which confuses Crusher even more.
Next, Bugs suggests Crusher memorize a rather large script but doesn't give him time to even start to look at it. Instead, several other wrestlers clobber him before he can react. After that, it is time for work on wrestling moves. Each new, and painful, move is demonstrated on Crusher, leaving him looking the worse for it. Bugs suggests a change of wardrobe and has the befuddled wrestler try a few improbable costumes. The rabbit settles on the least probable outfit of all, a strapless evening gown with matching heels and earrings and a pearl necklace. Crusher starts to object, but another wrestler, a female wrestler, happens to like it.
Crusher, with new look, is back in the ring and facing someone more his size this time. Bugs tells him to use his catchphrase and he'll have no problems. Crusher tries, and messes up the tongue twisters. Worse, his opponent eloquently corrects - and crudely clobbers - him.
Page 1: Metal folding chairs are a common prop used in professional wrestling. (RM)Page 2: Crusher uses a sink to hammer his opponent. While a sink is an unusual item, many strange items, such as a two-man kayak, have been used in professional wrestling. (RM)Page 3: Bugs' introduction is reminiscent of how Harold Hill starts things going for himself in The Music Man, which started as a play and was made into a movie in 1962.
Page 2: Crusher's loss on a count out is in error. He was still standing in the ring, and a wrestler only loses on a count out if he's outside the ring, or not on his feet. (RM)After Sylvester and another cat finish their meal from some trash cans, Sylvester makes light of the idea of brushing and flossing. The cat warns him that he'll be sorry. As Sylvester leaves, he hears Granny leaving Tweety. The cat climbs up a pipe, reaches Tweety, and almost eats the bird. But he can't manage it as his teeth give him so much pain he can't eat Tweety.
Sylvester goes back to the alley trash where the other cat taunts him about it. While looking through the trash, Sylvester spots a book on self-hypnosis which includes a section on controlling pain. He sets to work hypnotizing himself so he won't feel pain. The only thing that can end the effect is the sound of a whistle.
Sylvester goes after Tweety again, this time biting off part of a door to get in. The bird threatens him with a candy apple, but the cat eats it without trouble. This is repeated with a fudgesicle, sugar cubes, taffy, treacle, and all manner of hard or chewy food, and even a ball of tin foil. Nothing fazes the cat. Tweety suggests that so much eating indicates unhappiness and that Sylvester needs cheering up. The bird suggests whistling a tune, and demonstrates how to whistle - which puts a painful end to the anesthesia.
Only now does Sylvester start taking care of his teeth. While the cat brushes, Tweety disguises an explosive charge as himself. Sylvester returns, planning to swallow Tweety whole. He thinks he does, but when the charge detonates, it leaves Sylvester with a hole right through his stomach.
Page 1: This story probably takes place after 1998 or 1999, as indicated by the shirt worn in the fourth panel. The New York Yankees won the World Series both years. (EC) While the Yankees also won the Series in 2000, they did so well after this comic was written. Page 2: The sign, partly visible in the first panel, is for am electronics chain called Nobody Beats the Wiz which is based in New York City. (EC) Page 2: Tweety is singing Wannabe by The Spice Girls. This song was parodied by Weird Al Yankovic. (ARM) This story demonstrates a classic example of why masking pain with hypnosis isn't always a good idea: It doesn't treat the cause of the problem. Page 6: Tweety's line about howto whistle is from the 1944 film To Have and Have Not. Page 7: Tomás de Torquemada was the first Grand Inquisitor of Spain. That is, he lead the Spanish Inquisition. Sylvester's footpads are not colored in. Prissy urges Egghead to eat breakfast when Foghorn wanders past the window and misinterprets the situation. The rooster not only eats everything himself, but insists that Egghead needs fresh and exercise. Foghorn doesn't think much of the books that Egghead is always reading and tries getting the kid interested in baseball. The rooster gets a surprise when a fiery fly ball is the result of Egghead's reading Zen & the Art of the Great American Pastime. The ball lands on Dawg's house.
Alerted to the situation by the ball, Dawg interrupts and claims that not only would he be a better a coach, he'd teach a real man's game: football. Dawg loudly explains the game with a complex chart of plays, but also explains it in rather more simple terms in a whisper. He fairs no better than Foghorn did, thanks to Egghead's quick reading of Football and the Passive Aggressive Worldview. The rooster laughs this time.
Foghorn and Dawg argue over which game would be best for Egghead and realize they need one that Egghead can't show read about and show them up. A few games are suggested and rejected. They settle on cricket since Egghead doesn't have a book about it. That they also don't know anything at all about cricket does not stop them. They simply invent their own version by combining archery, basketball, hopscotch, and a few other things, including an alligator pit, into an obstacle course.
There is one problem, no even numbered teams can be made with only three players. This is solved by declaring the game be played every man for himself. Play starts and Dawg runs with the ball, such as it is, while Foghorn chases him. Egghead clobbers Dawg by throwing a book at him. The ball flies from Dawg and hits Foghorn on the head. The end result of play is a three-person collision. Prissy finds the three after they all seems to have ended up on the losing end of things.
The title references the 1989 movie Field of Dreams. Page 3: The book Zen & the Art of the Great American Pastime is a play on the real book Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance.Page 4: Foghorn echoes the most remembered line actually used during the Apollo 13 mission. Page 5: Dawg emphasizes the battle-like aspects of football, similar to how George Carlin did in the conclusion of his bit on the differences between baseball and football. This story is unusual in that Egghead doesn't emerge unscathed, but instead is wounded as badly as Foghorn and Dawg. Page 7: How can teams of 29 players have an even number of players?* Issue Index * Tabular Issue Index * Story Index * Creative People * Disclaimer *
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Last updated 02 January 2004